To all the young minds stepping into the world with endless possibilities ahead of you, and to the middle-aged warriors starting over after losses, career shifts, or life-altering transitions, I want to talk about a simple but powerful concept: “The Illusion of Should”. It’s something that stops us all in our tracks. It’s that voice that says, “I should be doing this, I should have more by now, I should be further along.” But today, I want to show you how this illusion is holding you back from truly achieving your dreams, and more importantly, how to break free from it and get on the path to manifesting everything you desire.
What is the Illusion of Should?
The Illusion of Should is that nagging feeling in your mind that tells you what you ought to do but never quite leads to action. It’s that list of expectations, either placed on you by society, family, or even yourself, that makes you feel like you’re constantly falling short.
For young people, this might look like pressure to go to college, get a “real” job, or hit certain milestones by a certain age. For those who are older, it may appear in the form of regrets: “I should have achieved more by now,” “I should have a stable career,” or “I should be financially secure.” But here’s the problem: Should keeps you in a cycle of guilt and self-doubt, instead of moving you toward real action.
Is It Laziness? Or Is It Something Else?
You might be wondering, “Am I just lazy? Is that why I haven’t made my dreams come true?” Often, the issue isn’t laziness. It’s about being stuck in the illusion that you’re obligated to follow someone else’s blueprint for your life. This illusion leads to paralysis. The energy you waste thinking about what you should do is energy you could be spending on creating your reality. But we confuse it with procrastination or lack of motivation when, in reality, we’re stuck in a loop of mental pressure.
How Do We Get Back to Winning?
Whether you’re a young adult stepping out into the world, or someone who’s faced significant setbacks and is rebuilding from the ground up, there are steps you can take to shift your mindset and move from the illusion of should into the realm of doing. And that’s where the magic happens. Here’s how:
Reframe Your “Should” Into “Will”
The first step to breaking free from the illusion of should is to change your language. Instead of saying, “I should start working on my dreams,” say, “I will work on my dreams.” The moment you reframe it, you begin to take ownership of your life.
Actionable Step: Each day, write down one action you will take towards your goal. It doesn’t matter how small the action is, the key is consistency.
Align Your Actions with Your Vision
It’s not enough to want more; you have to align your daily actions with the future you’re trying to create. This is where discipline comes in. Every action you take should be moving you closer to what you want. Even if money feels like a barrier, it’s often an excuse for not exploring alternatives. There are always resources available when you open your mind to possibility.
Actionable Step: Create a vision board or a clear, written goal plan that details what you want and the steps you need to take. Refer to it daily to remind yourself of your purpose.
Break It Down Into Smaller Steps
One of the biggest reasons we stay stuck in the illusion of should is because the goal damn far from hereseems too big. You want to make more money, but the path feels overwhelming. You want to rebuild after a divorce or loss, but the journey ahead seems exhausting. The key here is to break the big goal into smaller, achievable steps.
Actionable Step: If you want financial freedom, start with a small goal like saving $100 a month or learning about investment opportunities. If you want to start over after a loss, begin by setting one new habit or taking on one project that brings you joy.
Stop Waiting for the “Right” Time
There will never be a perfect time to start. Whether you’re young and just starting out, or older and rebuilding, waiting for the right moment keeps you stuck. You might think, “I’ll start when I have more money,” or “I’ll act when things settle down.” The truth is, success comes to those who act in spite of uncertainty.
Actionable Step: Start NOW. If you’re waiting for money, start learning new skills that don’t cost anything. If you’re waiting for confidence, take action anyway. Confidence comes after you act, not before.
Focus on Consistency, Not Perfection
One of the illusions we often fall into is thinking that our journey must be perfect. But life doesn’t work that way. It’s messy, unpredictable, and full of setbacks. The key is consistency. Show up every day, even when it’s hard. Even when it feels like you’re making little progress.
Actionable Step: Commit to spending at least 30 minutes a day workin Touch bingo way deleteg on your goals. Whether it’s building a business, improving your health, or creating art—just show up consistently. Over time, those small efforts will compound into real success.
Cultivate a Growth Mindset
One of the biggest blocks to success is a fixed mindset. This is when you believe that your abilities are set in stone, that you’re either good at something or you’re not. But a growth mindset believes that everything can be learned and improved upon. You can change, you can grow, and you can become who you need to be to succeed. These are we’re playing panties the things that I talk about in my up and coming book “If You Change Your Mind You Can Change your Life”
Actionable Step: Challenge yourself to learn something new every week. Whether it’s a skill related to your goals or something that expands your mind, the more you learn, the more possibilities open up.
Surround Yourself with the Right People
If you’re surrounded by people who reinforce the idea that you’re stuck, or that things are too hard, you’ll start to believe it. Your circle should be full of people who challenge you to think bigger, act boldly, and keep moving forward, even when times are tough.
Actionable Step: Join communities, both online and in person, that are filled with ambitious, growth-minded individuals. Distance yourself from people who drain your energy or make you doubt yourself.
Manifesting Your Dreams
The illusion of should is a thief of progress. It keeps you stuck, makes you question your abilities, and holds you back from doing the work that will manifest your dreams. But you are not stuck. You are powerful. Whether you’re just starting out in life, or you’re rebuilding after loss, you have the ability to shift from thinking you should be doing something to actually doing it.
The steps I’ve outlined—changing your language, aligning your actions, breaking down your goals, acting consistently, and surrounding yourself with the right people—will guide you to the life you desire. But the key is very simple: Action. You must act, no matter how small the step, no matter how uncertain the future feels. You must keep moving forward,”That’s how winning is done. One step at a time. One issue at a time. One day at a time.
So today, make a promise to yourself that You will start, no matter how small. You will act , no matter the task. And through that action, Then and only then you will start to harvest the benefits of your work, and manifest the life you’ve always dreamed of.
Your success is inevitable the moment you choose to believe in your own power and break free from the illusion of what you should do. Trust me, everything will start to fall into place. I believe in you, and now that you’re beginning to believe in yourself of limitless possibilities, I know it’s only a matter of time before I see you the other side living your new reality, thriving on the other side of your dreams. Keep going—you’ve got this!
Love Always
John Maurice